Sheherezade's
confessions before the 1,001th night
Quantum
physics, schizophrenia and the placebo effect: what do they all
have in common?
by
Adina Dabija
There, what samsara is discriminated from what nirvana? -
Nagarjuna
Tomorrow I will
be a queen or I'll die. I have lived a happy, exciting and
fulfilling life. I had fun saving my life with the wit of my
stories these past 1,000 nights, as my beloved Shahryar was
dropping the knife from my throat night after night, while I was
entertaining him with my artful wisdom. He was sitting on his
hundred silk and gold pillows, like a king, but in fact he was
just a teenager attending a re-education camp, getting some
liberating knowledge from me. I have sparked the desire of
knowledge in his eyes. I have re-framed his views. I have played
the puppeteer for 1,000 times, but still did not give him the most
important teaching of all. In fact, I was as careful as I could so
he keeps staying asleep. Yet if he will order that I am beheaded
tomorrow, as he did with the thousand virgins before me, I will
still die happy: I gave him enough knowledge for him to be a
better king.
But king is one
thing, man is another. To be a better man, one has to be willing
to take the risk to see beyond stories. One must be able to say: I
want to see behind the veil you are throwing on my enchanted
eyes... Will my king ever be able to do that?... Maybe if he will
throw away his knife from my throat and make me his wife I will I
have the courage to tell him that we live in a world of illusion –
of Sheherezades telling stories to sleeping bored kings? This
world works out only for moody kings to find their way out of
depression, like in my story about Harun al-Rashid. “One night
Harun al-Rashid felt himself weighed down by a heavy depression.
He said to his lieutenant Jafar, 'Brother and Wazir, my heart is
heavy.' Jafar replied, 'O King of Time, all joy and sorrow come
from within, but sometimes outside shows may have an influence
upon these humors. Have you made trial of any outside shows
today?' The sultan said, 'I have taken up in my fingers and let
fall all the jewels of my treasury; the rubies, the emeralds, and
the sapphires, but not one of them lifted my soul to pleasure. I
have been to my harem and passed in review the white and the
brown, the copper colored and the dark, but none of them lifted my
soul to gladness. I went to my stables, but not one of my
countless horses could amuse me, and the veil of the world has not
lifted.'
Today, as I put
on my most beautiful dress, my most charming butterfly-shaped
jewelry and my most arousing perfume to go in the king's bedroom
for one more time, I see more and more clear that becoming a queen
or dying is no different. The veil of illusion has not been
removed from the king's eyes. In the world of perception and
senses, changing the way we perceive and conceptualize things will
determine the way we experience them. But what is beyond
experience? What is beyond this world of multiple realities I have
weaven for the king?
I should tell the
king tonight, as Rumi wrote (or will write, time is of no
importance): “Uncross your eyes, see no multiples!”. But how could
I do that? How can I walk the king out of his world of knife -
no-knife, life - death, to marry or not to marry? To be or not to
be – that is not the question. The question is what is
beyond being and non-being? What is beyond seeing a glass half
empty or half full? Full or empty are still states of a perceived
object. I can trick the king's mind to believe the glass is half
full, I can even trick him that he as an observer is fused with
the object of his perception and the glass would not even exist
without him, the observer - and tomorrow I'll be queen!! But... is
this what I want? How can I help the king see the things as they
are – empty of meaning like the sky full of stars? Should I lift
myself from this world of desire and knife and stop telling
deceiving stories to keep a king happy and asleep?...
But then, if I do
that... what will happen with things like quantum physics,
schizophrenia and the placebo effect that are all based upon
multiple states of being? How would faith healing be possible? Or
those charming unreliable narrator stories, just like my own tales
– say Lolita, The Catcher is the Rye... in which we trust and we
don't trust the narrator at the same time? Would my beautiful
weaven stories will be forever forgotten?... My stories... My?...
But who am I?... asked Sheherezade while clipping the last pin in
her hair, starring at her unsettling image in the mirror as for
the first time, before stepping out of her room to enter the
king's bedroom one more time.